trulyfab

This time last year boytoy got down on one knee and proposed, well i never gave him the chance i told him to get up and stop making a twat of me, The people in the street around us were more disapointed i did'nt say yes than i was. Next morning he asked me to move in with him, again i said no. I wonder where or what i would be doing now if i had said yes. Thinking on it, i've been married and it was'nt a happy one, the whole thing took longer to organise than the actual marrige lasted..yip married in March wanted a divorce in the October. I wonder what would have happened if we had'nt parted. Then there's C.B'S dad, lived with him or he lived with me for 4 years, now if he had got his act together i wonder what i would be doing now. Seems for my 33 years i have been in a few serious relationships where it does'nt go anywhere. Then there was J, i'm glad we did'nt get that mortgage now. I wonder how many more relationships i will have before i find a soulmate or if indeed i ever do.
I'm not going all i want a b/f on you so don't worry and if truth be told i don't know if little miss independant here could handle a proper relationship. In the past few years i have seen good friends split up and divorce who i thought were solid, that saying you never know what goes on behind closed doors is so true.
C.B's dad has been trying to reach her all afternoon, i can't even speak to the wimp so i just keep hitting reject, i wonder how long it wil take before i can have a civil conversaton with im or even if i want to have one with him. Out of all my past relationships he's the only one who i have to have a contact number for, I wonder if that 41 bus that drives down his street will ever crash into him.
I wonder if asda has any of there black roses left, i have black roses already in my kitchen but the emo chick in me loves me. I wonder if tomorrow it will be raining, i woNder if on thursday it might be better to get the train rather than my mum driving us in. I wonder if i can be annoyed to pull the sewing machine out and fix her school trousers tonight. Lots of things to wonder about

I'm not sure if i've slept. Went to bed around 1ish then yp again at 2 because sleep would'nt come even though my eyes were tired. Heard the party gooers coming back about 4ish and singing very badly. Obvioulsy not ereyone knew where the after after party was as you could hear them all shouting at each other and making phone calls. At one point i heard someone say "thats D's house" but my nest was in darkness so thankfully they never chapped my door. Now reverse a right few hours, Party number 1 finished at back of midnight and i had told someone i would drop them off as my taxi route was on the way, so went to phone a taxi and of course being young meant that at least one person started an argument, could'nt go anywhere as the big yin wanted to go sort it leaving me with her youngest. Happily everything was resolved with a few different taxi's coming and taking the numptys away, Birthday girl said it did'nt spoil her night so i'm pleased about that. I did consider going to party number 2 but when i realised who would all be there i decided home was best as they had drank to much and would no doubt end up with someone bickering, and these were peeps older than me, to be honest i can't do the whole partying on with carebear in tow (wer eloads of kids going onto party 2 as it was in a house and the could all crash out on beds etc but carebear does'nt like me drinking so we opted for home. Party number 3 sounded good even if the singing was crap but heard no trouble and everyone ws in good spirits..or on spirits. I only got up and danced once last night, so not like me but i wsa having realy interesting chat and the time flew by so when Loch Lomond came on carebear looked at me from across the hall with her gothic eyes and i could'nt resist a wee jig. Carebear had a fab time, loads of kids so they seemed to be having there own party, they grabbed loads of food from the buffet and cans of juice and set up camp at a different table where no adults were allowed unless it wsa to hand over food or juice. The costumes were amazing, only a few did'nt dress up and as each new person entered the hall the d.j make a little joke...all in good fun of course. Bit worried about the big yin, she put her homemade beard on with carpet glue and so much fake tan, could posibly end up in a trip to the hospital today, no really once she sobers up and tries to get the beard off she's going to fel it, can't wait to see how long the fake tan takes to come off as only half her face is bronzed up.
Oh taxi going there, really thought i wsa going to get it for free, driver could'nt keep his eyes on the road, i wore a really long coat but still my legs managed to escape, thankfully i was holding the birthday cake so not to much was reveled, damn that b'day cake i could have saved a fiver lol.