trulyfab

ok ive never been one for keeping my own colour of hair,last month i was cosmic blue before that ultra violet before that deep red,ok so general idea is i dye my hair diffrent colours every month and i really have no idea what my natural hair would look like.in preperation for connect fest today ive got up kinda early and dyed my hair eggplant (thats what it says on the box) but im sitting here and its getting pinker and pinker by the minute lol

Firstly i'd like to say thank you to all that sent me happy birthday greetings,another year closer to the zimmer frame and having to admit that maybe im an adult,is'nt it funny how when your a teenager you want to be an adult and when that time comes you want to be a child again lol,but thanks people it made a diffrence to my day by getting those few messages

Now tomorrow is when im going to celebrate,all my family are either abroad at the moment or live to far away to help me eat the cake so me my daughter and 13 other people are going to the connect festival to see gomez and another few random bands.had a few glases of wine after work so this is a totally random blog.

really excited about tomorrow my daughters first festival and the ants are definetly in her pants

thought i'd tell you all about the strike the up here on wednesday,basicaly the council workers went on a one day strike to protest about our annual wage rise,we got offered 2.5% which the unions rejected because inflation is above 3% unison said no so they want at least 5%
now i was in a union for,well since i started working 16 years ago but came out of it last year because i was loosing to much money with strikes etc so i was at work,i didnt cross any picket lines as they were away by the time my shift started but on wednesday so i didnt cross it (technically) on tuesday i was told by three peeps that i was out of order first one said if i crossed it i'd get my name wrote on a flip chart,told her i'd happily write my own name as its a twat to spell and i'd write it myself (since i got divored i changed my name back to my maiden name which is lithuanan) second person told me he would spit on me ( very mature a 50 something wanting to spit on a young girl) third one told me that if i wasnt willing to go out that i'd still be wiling to take the rise (informed her that she shouldve realised i wasnt in a union as i wouldve contacted them when she reduced the hours that i was contracted too)
now heres the intresting part unison now want to do a 3 day strike followed by a five day strike,everyone who gave me grief has now decided that if that happens they will leave the union as they cant afford to take time off!!!!!!
my only defence is that im on a poor wage as it is and even taking one day off is the equivalent to either my weekly shopping bill or being able to pay my electricity for a week,i know many people will still think im nasty by not going out but unless you pay my bills or pick up my wage then dont judge,i already work 2 jobs to make ends meet,my rent doesnt pay its self and considering i already have a sift against me i really cant afford to loose a days pay

well its dairy milk but both cadburys so its all good well no its not good,ive dragged the soap box out of the cupboard and all 5 foot 1 n a haf of me is going to have an ickle rants about..........EBAY
how fucken dare they allow it to happen,the goverment have to step in before i get blacklisted from the site again,it all happened this morning,Oasis tickets on sale at 9 and im at my daughters school dropping her off,was waiting patiently for the bell to ring so i could run back home,i had already logged onto ticketmaster before i left the house so not much to doapart from a few clicks.but feckin friends had a million and one questions about the stupid (well not stupid) strike that the council wre on.so missed the opportunity to get them before going to work (not in a union) place was empty so i pist off at haf 10 ran home and low n behold they were sold out,so went to ebay and im really sorry but a starting price of 200 for 2 tickets is ludicrous (someone tell me i spelt that right please) how the fuck can ebay reps turn round and say that people sell these tickets because they have other commitments and there entitled to.yeah ok its an age old arguement but c'mmon to fuck theres people liek me who work to go to gigs (and look after my daughter and pay bils ut u get my general view) and cant get tickets because theres so many greedy people out there,i can honestly say hand on swining brick that i have nevr sold a ticket to make money from it
rant over but only because im really wanting a little smoke of some nice stuff and my carebearws sleeping so mummy can chill with a homemade cig and cup of coffee
i'll rant about the strike tomorrow

Went to a 21st on friday night with a mate who took it upon himself that i would have a ball at this party so i tagged along and yeah it was ok but the music was bad my ears bleed and dont know how im not still talking funny after all the helium needed to join in.yeah so anyways stayed with my mate again , the one i drunkenly fell into bed with the other week and guess what? yip fell into his bed again,was a good girl yet again and didnt go the full way but only because the one condom we could find between us ended up with baby oil on it and split.i dont actually think its a bad thing that it happened as im not sure how things would be with us if we did actually have sex!!!!! then again 2 people over the age of 30,known each other for years,so maybe it wouldnt be to bad.
now i know i said the boytoy was gone blah blah blah but left my mates flat and phoned boytoy telling him i was on the train on my way to see him so he better be in (think i may have still bn drunk) so there i trotted up to his house for some much needed lovin,not sure anymore whos stringing who along

not really worth it,think ive made a decision over the boytoy,cant be with someone who does smack,not fair on anyone and if i liked him that much then i wouldnt be falling into my mates bed

Before ging back to work,spent most of it baking cakes and getting ready for tomorrow,im actually thinking of handing my notice in,i know ive been here with this conundrum a thousand times but since there reducing my hours even with my other job im really going to struggle financially.i really fancy doing work with teenagers who are in care or ready to leave it,its a daunting experience when leaving care homes and not alot of support,i dont have the right peper work for it but i reacon if i can do it volountry to begin with then the organisation will train me up and then hopefully get a full time job out it.not really sure what to do friends and family think its a great idea but the thought of being financialy strained even more is a worry even though i know if i gain f/t employment i'd be on a decent salary.

Went through to the Edinburgh festival on friday night and had a fab time watching a few comedians and street preformers infact it was so good that i stayed til sunday only going home to pick up my daughter whoi had promised to take to the festival.So bright and early on monday we traveled through and had agreed to stay at the boytoys house as his kids were coming home on monday.The kids had a fantastic time,the sun was out so we were able to sit on the ground and watch the street performers (must upload some pics) the edinburgh festival really is great if you dont mind getting bumped and bashed by tourists who look at you as if ur daft when you tell them to apologise to a 8 year old child who theyve managed to floor with there rucksacks!!!!
So heres the trust or stupidity bit,on the way back to boytots house he told the kids to run up the shops for milk etc but my little darling being a bit weary of the area wanted to come with me,which was fine, boytoy ran ahead as he apparently needed the loo,we got in the house a few minutes after him and me being me went n got carrier bag and started tidying up the mess i had left from te day before.i picked up a box of cigs which i thought was empty as i had left them there (we smoke diffrent brands) and ther it was an empty cig box full of foil. Now it was last november when we met 3rd to be exact and in june he told me he was on methadone,reason he didnt tell me before,because of my ramblings about smack heads and how i dont like them around me or my daughter how i dont trust them etc, so he decided that if i got to know him then i couldnt judge about the meths as it was him i liked and if i had known before i wouldnt have gave him the time of day.i think i dealt with the whole methadone thing really well and another few secrets that he divuldged at the same time,took me a couple of weeks to get my head around it all but my head around it i did,but now after finding foil that was clearly used well my heads a bit fecked,was all for going home last night until i realised it would mean walking my daughter around glasgow and edinburgh very late at night and probably not getting home til well after midnight.I made the point of telling him that i had moved the cig packet from the living room into his bedroom so that he would know that i knew.got al the kids settled for bed and told him that we needed to talk,i explained what i saw how it made me feel and i was basicly told i was being childish and not to talk to him,im great at not talking to people ,ask my dad i think its been 7 years since i muttered a word to him) He tried to reasure me after 3 hours of silence that he hadnt been smoking kit and it was a coping mecanism(when things get so bad he takes it out and remembers how bad things can really get) so now he wants to know if i trust him ,and i just really dont know.

At the end of june i was told that my hours would be decreased due to the budget and the school role had dropped,wasnt really sure how by reducing my hours i was going to save the coucilo from going bankrupt.I did ask if this was applying to anyone else and was told that 2 members of staff had been deployed to other schools across the authority.
Had to pop into work today to pick up wage slips and plus it was a good way of remembering how to get there after 5 weeks of holidays!!!!,was speaking to the office woman and having a pop at my hours being decreased and how it had basiclly left me skint during the holidays and not being able to do much with my daughter (done the free stuff bout 10 times over but now daughter wants to do theme parks etc) so as i was having my ickle moan and groan she told me that everyone (including her daughter) had basically been given letters telling them not to come back at the start of the new term,so i suppose i should count myself lucky that im on a permanent contract.
But whast really annoying is that when the job im currently doing became available it was the school that contacted me as they had heard good things about my work and qulifications,so they approached me and i gave up a really good with scottish power as there catering manager,silly me shouldve realised that the council will shaft anyone and everyone regarless of the fact they approaced me, no interview just a if ur interested when can you start!!!!!
oh n while im having my moan,bob the builder crisps are crap dont waste 15p on them

Of freedom before going back to work,and right on cue the sun is now out,bloody typical.
The weekend there was ok,decided to just stay in with a load of beers dvd's and some nice smokey stuff,my mate was up at L@LL so he phoned me to let me hear sets and sent loads of pics of the festival of mud,been reading a few reviews of it and they werent that great so im glad i stayed at home although a few days away wouldve been nice,not to worry its nearly october break
so one wekend of freedom left,so i really must take the most of it or make the most of it even!!! one night out with friends getting drunk after dinner of course,i fancy tapas but got a feeling it'll be a subway or kfc,and spend the rest of the weekend with the boytoy,not sure how his little meltdowns going,he stayed at the weekend ok he was a bit sleepy not very talkative but he still managed to put a smile or 4 on my face.
can i just quickly say how rubish it was for massa at the grand prix yesterday,3 laps to go and his bloody engine gave out smoke so thats it lewis hamilton got the points,3 week break for him to hopefully get a kickin and be unable to compete for the rest of the season.(yes that is a nasty thing to say but ..wel there isnt any buts im just being nasty)

Was planning n spending the next 3 days in a tent and listening to some bands but after a phone call at 7 oclock this morning to tell me the felds mush and that even the organisers are having trouble getting the place set up i had second thoughts,i dont mind mud but this is just a mud bath,take one of the worst down pours at glastonbury and youve got teh general idea,i got teh tickets free fro this fest so although im obviously gutted at not going i may still pop up n see the sex pistols then go home again,well i say home my way of thinking now is that use teh spending £ and just book into a hotel over lookng the loch,not sure if i'll manage that now as the place will be full of tourists also the other reason im not fussed is the fact the neds are in full force with the bottles of buckie and other cheap wreck the house juice.
nice hotel warm water on tap clean sheets idylic view and my boytoy all to myself with no kid sto worry about,now doesnt that sound so much nicer than a muddy field and ppl peeing anywher and everywhere?